235 Newspaper Puns That Are Breaking the News with Laughs!

Last updated on October 28th, 2024 at 04:29 pm

Newspapers have always been a source of information, but who says they can’t be a source of laughter too? Here are 235 newspaper puns that will tickle your funny bone and leave you in stitches. From headline humor to editorial antics, these puns will make you see the funny side of the daily news.

1. 📰 Headline Hilarity

📰 Headline Hilarity
  1. “I read an article about a company producing manure. It was a real scoop.”
  2. “The newspaper’s headline writer went to prison for making a criminal pun.”
  3. “The local paper is shrinking. It’s noteworthy.”
  4. “Breaking news: broken.”
  5. “The editor’s job is always on the line.”
  6. “Headline: ‘The Chef Who Couldn’t Cook’. That’s a real page-turner.”
  7. “Extra, extra! Read all about it!”
  8. “I once made a pun in the newspaper, but it didn’t make the cut.”
  9. “The journalist’s favorite exercise? Running stories.”
  10. “I made a joke about the newspaper, but it didn’t print.”

2. 📰 Editorial Antics

  1. “The editor decided to take a break from work and have a coffee.”
  2. “Why did the editor go to therapy? Headline stress.”
  3. “Editors love a good command.”
  4. “The editorial team loves to punctuate their jokes.”
  5. “The editor’s favorite type of humor? Sar-chasm.”
  6. “They call it the editorial board because it’s so engaging.”
  7. “An editor’s favorite snack? Editorial crisps.”
  8. “The editor’s desk is where the magic happens.”
  9. “Editing is a real cutting job.”
  10. “The editor’s favorite part of the day? Deadline.”

3. 📰 Reporter’s Riddles

 📰 Reporter's Riddles
  1. “Why did the reporter go to jail? They got caught pressing charges.”
  2. “Reporters are so good at their jobs, it’s unreal.”
  3. “The best way to interview a clock? Press for time.”
  4. “The reporter got a promotion. Now they’re a newsflash.”
  5. “Why did the reporter wear sunglasses? Their future was too bright.”
  6. “Reporters are always in a hurry because they’re on a deadline.”
  7. “The reporter’s pen is their sword.”
  8. “Why are reporters so great? They always find the scoop.”
  9. “A reporter’s favorite part of a tree? The root cause.”
  10. “Why do reporters love math? They enjoy solving the story problems.”

4. 📰 Pressing Puns

  1. “The printer is so loud, it’s hard to get a press release.”
  2. “The press operator took up yoga to relieve press-ure.”
  3. “A printer’s favorite dance? The press-o double.”
  4. “The press went on strike. It was an impressive event.”
  5. “The newspaper’s press conference was a real press-entation.”
  6. “When the press machine broke down, it was a real pressing issue.”
  7. “Press operators love a good press-cription.”
  8. “A press operator’s favorite music? Press-sure.”
  9. “The press needs a vacation, it’s under too much pressure.”
  10. “Why did the press operator become a chef? They loved the press-sure cooker.”

5. 📰 Comic Strips and Quips

  1. “Why did the comic strip go to school? To get drawn out.”
  2. “Comic strips always have the best punchlines.”
  3. “The comic strip’s favorite subject? Art.”
  4. “Comics love to be animated.”
  5. “The comic strip got a standing ovation.”
  6. “Why was the comic strip sad? It felt out of line.”
  7. “A comic strip’s worst fear? Writer’s block.”
  8. “The funniest comic strip always gets the last laugh.”
  9. “Comics always draw a lot of attention.”
  10. “The comic strip artist’s favorite tool? The pencil.”

6. 📰 Breaking News Banter

📰 Breaking News Banter
  1. “Breaking news: the printer is out of ink!”
  2. “Why was the news always late? It kept breaking.”
  3. “Breaking news: the reporter broke their leg!”
  4. “The best news is always breaking.”
  5. “Breaking news: the weather is unpredictable!”
  6. “Why did the news go to therapy? It kept breaking down.”
  7. “Breaking news: the internet is down!”
  8. “The news loves to break the silence.”
  9. “Breaking news: the headline is missing!”
  10. “Why did the news get fired? It couldn’t stop breaking.”

7. 📰 Journalistic Jokes

  1. “A journalist walked into a bar. The story was incredible.”
  2. “Journalists are always on the lookout for good news.”
  3. “Why are journalists great at parties? They know how to headline.”
  4. “A journalist’s favorite dessert? Scoop of ice cream.”
  5. “Journalists never run out of stories.”
  6. “Why did the journalist bring a ladder? To get a better perspective.”
  7. “The journalist’s notebook was filled with notes.”
  8. “A journalist’s favorite game? Clue.”
  9. “Journalists are great at investigating mysteries.”
  10. “Why did the journalist become a detective? They loved uncovering facts.”

8. 📰 Paparazzi Puns

  1. “Why do paparazzi make terrible friends? They always snap.”
  2. “Paparazzi are always on the chase.”
  3. “The paparazzi’s favorite game? Capture the flag.”
  4. “Why did the paparazzi get fired? They couldn’t focus.”
  5. “Paparazzi are known for their flashy behavior.”
  6. “Why did the paparazzi fail math? They couldn’t find the angle.”
  7. “Paparazzi are always zooming around.”
  8. “A paparazzi’s favorite food? Shots of espresso.”
  9. “Paparazzi love to frame their subjects.”
  10. “Why do paparazzi love sports? They’re great at shooting.”

9. 📰 Newspaper Nerdiness

  1. “Newspapers love pressing issues.”
  2. “Why are newspapers so smart? They’re always informed.”
  3. “The newspaper’s favorite instrument? The press-ion.”
  4. “Why did the newspaper go to school? To get more literate.”
  5. “Newspapers are always on the cutting edge.”
  6. “The best part of the newspaper? The opinion section.”
  7. “Newspapers never run out of ink.”
  8. “The newspaper’s favorite color? Black and white.”
  9. “Why did the newspaper get an award? It had the best columns.”
  10. “Newspapers are great at keeping current.”

10. 📰 Printing Puns

  1. “The printer ran out of ink; it was a real problem.”
  2. “Why did the printer go on a diet? It was too toner.”
  3. “Printing jokes are always well-pressed.”
  4. “The printer’s favorite holiday? Press-idents Day.”
  5. “Why did the printer get promoted? It was the best impression.”
  6. “Printing is a real press-ure job.”
  7. “The printer’s favorite sport? Press-ups.”
  8. “Why did the printer go to the gym? To get in print shape.”
  9. “Printers never run out of toner.”
  10. “Printing is always in demand.”

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11. 📰 Columnist Chuckles

  1. “The columnist got a promotion; now they’re a column-s.”
  2. “Why did the columnist get fired? They couldn’t line up.”
  3. “Columnists love to be in print.”
  4. “The columnist’s favorite shape? A line.”
  5. “Why did the columnist go to therapy? Writer’s block.”
  6. “Columnists never run out of ideas.”
  7. “The columnist’s favorite drink? Column-nade.”
  8. “Why did the columnist take a nap? To get a new angle.”
  9. “Columnists love to write.”
  10. “Why did the columnist join the gym? To get in line shape.”

12. 📰 Page-Turning Puns

  1. “The book was so good, I couldn’t put it down.”
  2. “Page-turners are always exciting.”
  3. “Why did the book go to school? To get book-smart.”
  4. “The book’s favorite part? The binding.”
  5. “Why are books so good at conversations? They’re great at plotting.”
  6. “Books are the best at telling a story.”
  7. “Why did the book get a promotion? It had a great cover.”
  8. “Books love to be well-read.”
  9. “Why are books always happy? They’re full of good stories.”
  10. “Books never get old.”

13. 📰 Headline Grins

  1. “The headline was so funny, it made the front page.”
  2. “Why are headlines always happy? They get all the attention.”
  3. “The headline’s favorite shape? A line.”
  4. “Headlines love to be bold.”
  5. “Why did the headline get an award? It was the most read.”
  6. “Headlines are always eye-catching.”
  7. “The headline’s favorite sport? Line dancing.”
  8. “Why are headlines always in a hurry? They’re on a deadline.”
  9. “Headlines never run out of news.”
  10. “Why did the headline go to therapy? It was too much stress.”

14. 📰 Typographic Twists

  1. “The typographer’s favorite drink? Bold coffee.”
  2. “Why did the typographer go to therapy? Font stress.”
  3. “Typographers love a good type.”
  4. “Why are typographers great artists? They know how to draw attention.”
  5. “The typographer’s favorite hobby? Writing.”
  6. “Why did the typographer get promoted? They had the best type.”
  7. “Typographers love to font-ter.”
  8. “Why did the typographer take a nap? To get a new perspective.”
  9. “The typographer’s favorite sport? Type-ball.”
  10. “Why did the typographer go to school? To get more type-smart.”

15. 📰 Publishing Pranks

  1. “The publisher’s favorite drink? Printer’s ale.”
  2. “Why did the publisher get fired? They couldn’t bind.”
  3. “Publishers love a good story.”
  4. “The publisher’s favorite sport? Binding.”
  5. “Why did the publisher go to school? To get more literature.”
  6. “Publishers are always pressing on.”
  7. “Why are publishers always happy? They’re full of stories.”
  8. “The publisher’s favorite shape? A line.”
  9. “Why did the publisher take a nap? To get a new angle.”
  10. “Publishers never run out of ideas.”

16. 📰 Circulation Comedy

  1. “The circulation manager loves to spread the news.”
  2. “Why did the circulation manager go to therapy? Paper stress.”
  3. “Circulation managers love to distribute happiness.”
  4. “Why are circulation managers great at parties? They know how to spread joy.”
  5. “The circulation manager’s favorite game? Pass the parcel.”
  6. “Circulation managers never run out of news.”
  7. “Why did the circulation manager get promoted? They had the best distribution.”
  8. “Circulation managers are always on the move.”
  9. “The circulation manager’s favorite drink? Distribution-ade.”
  10. “Why did the circulation manager take a nap? To get a new perspective.”

17. 📰 Press Room Pranks

  1. “The press room is always buzzing.”
  2. “Why did the press room get an award? It was the most productive.”
  3. “The press room’s favorite drink? Press-urade.”
  4. “Why are press rooms always happy? They’re full of news.”
  5. “The press room loves to print happiness.”
  6. “Why did the press room go to therapy? Stress.”
  7. “Press rooms never run out of stories.”
  8. “The press room’s favorite sport? Press-ball.”
  9. “Why did the press room take a nap? To get a new perspective.”
  10. “The press room’s favorite game? Press-up.”

18. 📰 Daily Digest Drollery

  1. “The daily digest is always full of news.”
  2. “Why did the daily digest get an award? It was the most read.”
  3. “The daily digest’s favorite drink? Digestive tea.”
  4. “Why are daily digests always happy? They’re full of good news.”
  5. “The daily digest loves to summarize.”
  6. “Why did the daily digest go to therapy? Stress.”
  7. “Daily digests never run out of stories.”
  8. “The daily digest’s favorite sport? Digest-ball.”
  9. “Why did the daily digest take a nap? To get a new angle.”
  10. “The daily digest’s favorite game? Digest-ive.”

19. 📰 Newsstand Nonsense

  1. “The newsstand is always busy.”
  2. “Why did the newsstand get an award? It was the most productive.”
  3. “The newsstand’s favorite drink? Stand-ade.”
  4. “Why are newsstands always happy? They’re full of news.”
  5. “The newsstand loves to sell happiness.”
  6. “Why did the newsstand go to therapy? Stress.”
  7. “Newsstands never run out of stories.”
  8. “The newsstand’s favorite sport? Stand-ball.”
  9. “Why did the newsstand take a nap? To get a new perspective.”
  10. “The newsstand’s favorite game? Stand-off.”

20. 📰 Journal Jests

  1. “The journal is always full of stories.”
  2. “Why did the journal get an award? It was the most read.”
  3. “The journal’s favorite drink? Journal-ade.”
  4. “Why are journals always happy? They’re full of good news.”
  5. “The journal loves to record happiness.”
  6. “Why did the journal go to therapy? Writer’s block.”
  7. “Journals never run out of stories.”
  8. “The journal’s favorite sport? Journal-ball.”
  9. “Why did the journal take a nap? To get a new angle.”
  10. “The journal’s favorite game? Journal-ive.”

Conclusion

These 235 newspaper puns are guaranteed to add a bit of humor to your day. Whether you’re a journalist, a reader, or just someone who loves a good laugh, these puns will keep you entertained and in good spirits. Here’s a recap of our top newspaper puns:

Remember, the next time you pick up a newspaper, don’t just look for the news—look for the laughs too. Happy reading!

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